The opinions expressed in this public online diary are my own personal opinions, thoughts, and feelings and do not represent anyone else's view including family members, my employer, and friends in anyway, unless of course you believe in GOD and constantly need JESUS through Mother Mary with His power to save, heal, and instill forever peace like I constantly need him.

MatthewJames k:

MATTHEWJAMES klump-pdx.com (klump)

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Dear Lia Cecilia Pretorius Botsford - Please my sister hear my words. I, MatthewJames, your brother am asking you for your own sake one more time. In order for you to begin to self-heal spiritually, and to heal all of your male relationships including with me - I am telling you that you need to forgive your father Frederick Ellsworth Grover for the pain, trauma, and hurt that he caused you, and for all bad feelings or getting back at him. I know you cannot forget, and neither can I, but we must forgive him from our heart. Then we must forgive ourselves. With that he rests in peace, and so we to also will live in peace, and maybe even have a happy death ourselves. I am sorry he hurt you, I was too incapable to understand. Lia, I am sorry he hurt you the way no one should with sexual sin. Please forgive him Lia! Please forgive me lia dear sister. Please forgive him from your heart dear Lia... please forgive me dear sister lia, and lets find true lasting peace together...

Why are you suddenly so worried about me and my soul Matthew? And how is the relationship between you and I damaged?

I am deeply disturbed by this message you've sent me and I need to know first and foremost what you perceive to need healing in the relationship between you and I. I love you. I've always loved you and I will always love you unconditionally. As far as I knew, the most difficult thing about our relationship is how little we get to see each other due to where we live. I know that my long distance communication skills are spotty at best and that in large part has to do with my tendency to over commit myself and my tenuous time management skills, which I continue to work on. So tell, dear brother, what about our relationship is in poor repair and needs healing?

I see that I have gotten the attention of your true heart now, and that the decision to cancel me or not (which I am quite use to now more saddly) will be yours alone – I leave it to you.

I said what I said because I have fear for you over the last twenty or so years, and that I love you enough to not withhold from you the complete truth. In our relationship together the complete truth was withheld from you because I was incapable intellectually or spiritually by reason or by faith to more fully communicate to you what the complete truth actually is.

I love you and I am sorry because I want you to be in Heaven with me – You are my beloved remaining sister, you are my family, and it absolutely matters what happens to your body, to your mind, and to your soul. So I care for you to say these words from the heart.

You deserve the complete truth, and I know I have put myself on thin ice with you at risking everything if you are open to hearing something more at your leisure… What do you think?

I would never cancel you. I am not religious Matt. At all. That doesn't make me a bad person. I will deeply offend you if we discuss that further.

Of course you are a kind and gentle person and not totally bad as I try to be also. I have heard and seen most all of the bad that people can do to each other, so in that way you cannot offend.


Please go in peace.

Are you canceling me then?

Of course not. Love and peace for you.

And you also.

In peace forever of Jesus Christ Our Lord through Our Blessed Mother Mary, Mother of All Christians, and with Our Spiritual Father Saint Joseph. Pray for us. Amen.

-Matthew James K.

In and through the Mass and Our Blessed Mother Mary - Star Ashes to Star Ashes, Star Dust to Star Dust, from Star Ashes we came as Clay Men of the Earth, and to Star Ashes from Clay we must physically return. Oh grant us our true Christian Resurrected Bodies and let not your beloved decay, Oh God we Pray, as Thee and Most Loving Mother Mary – Accept our repentance, conversion, and eternal commitment to thy sanctifying grace restored within us.

 In the Mass is His own self-perpetuating love and origin of all proves further the argument that God Exists, and all hearing the Good News (the Healing, the Gospel, and the Word of God) should not reject the argument for Salvation, but instead accept him whole-heartedly without the influence of humankind, artificial, or Sin (the world, the flesh, and the devil).

 The Mass Never Ends, It Must Be Lived – So Lets Us Go Forth To Love and Serve The Lord!


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